80 Funniest Christmas Wishes For Him/Her, Family And Friends!

Like the snow in the winter, joy dominates during Christmas. This is a time to celebrate like never before. And nothing can get you in the holiday spirit like a funny Christmas wish. You can spread the joy of Christmas by using these amusing Christmas wishes.

These are some of the funniest holiday greetings to brighten someone’s day. Therefore, don’t be afraid to inject some clever humor into the Christmas SMS that you send to your friends and loved ones. You might be looking for some amusing and humorous Christmas wishes and greetings this year.

Funny Christmas Wishes

Here are a few of our favorite funny Christmas wishes.

• “Christmas is all about spending time with good people. So makes sure you spend the entire day with me tomorrow. Merry Christmas!”
• “Wishing for a fat bearded guy to visit you at night is weird but I guess that’s tradition for you. Merry Christmas!”

• “Good luck with wishing people unrealistic things from someone who doesn’t even exist. Have a great Christmas this year!”
• “I’ll declare war if you throw a snowball at me. Let’s make this the happiest Christmas we’ve ever had! Merry Christmas!”

• “I hope Santa fills our socks with cash instead of gifts and toys. I know you hope for the same. Wishing you a happy Christmas!”
• “I know you are feeling grinchy, but I wish your Christmas to be merry! Best wishes to you!”
• “I’ve never decked the halls and I have no idea what Jingle Bell rock is. But I hope your Christmas rocks!”
• “Merry Christmas! May the lines at the stores you shop at be short, and may your patience be long this holiday season!”
• “May your Christmas be as fat, happy, and plentiful as Santa’s! Merry Christmas!”
• “Enjoy this Christmas till you find your name on Santa’s naughty list.”
• “May your Christmas be spent eating candies and cakes as long as you don’t forget to brush your teeth. Wishing you a Merry Xmas!”
• “Merry Christmas! May Santa bring you winning lottery tickets in your socks!”
• “Merry Christmas! May you not lose any packages in the mail this holiday season. (And may they be delivered on time too!)”

Funny Christmas Messages

• “Christmas is not only for praying and praising. But for drinking and messing around also. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!”
• “Is Santa so busy that he cannot find time to groom himself? I think he needs to shave his beard.”
• “Yours was the most wonderful Christmas greeting of all. However, you are the one who should be filling my socks at Christmas, not my inbox!”
• “Everyone knows the most important part of the Christmas celebration is spending time with family you don’t get to see very often. Then you have an excuse to neglect them for the rest of the year.”
• “Yes, Santa clause does exist and his beards are fake. He appears once a year because the rest of the days he’s just your dad!”
• “Christmas is a time for remembering family and trying to guess everyone’s sizes! Have a Wonderful Christmas!”
• “There are four stages in life: 1) You believe in Santa Claus. 2) You don’t believe in Santa Claus. 3) You are Santa Claus. 4) You look like Santa Claus.”
• “A peach is a peach, a plum is a plum, and a kiss is not a kiss unless it’s with tongues. So open your mouth, close your eyes, and give your tongue some exercise! Merry Christmas!”
• “Dear Santa, If you promise to be nice and give me everything on my list, I promise to give you the antidote to those poisonous cookies you just ate. Thank you.”

• “The best Christmas gifts are those given from the heart. On the other hand, cash and gift cards are effective too! Merry Christmas!”
• “I think Santa should hire giants instead of elves so that he can have a faster production of gifts. Have a fun Christmas!”
• “Dearest God, this Christmas I planned on going green. So please get the point and send me lots of cash this Christmas. Thank you!”
• “Santa was looking at a painting of a naked woman with leaves covering her body for a long time. Santa asked what are you doing and she answered: Waiting for autumn.”
• “Listen to my logic, it’s Jesus’ birthday, not yours or mine. So maybe we can skip the buying gift ritual and save money this holiday. Merry Christmas.”

Funny Christmas Wishes for Him

• “Sending your way a bundle of warm wishes and good luck on this holiday. Take my love and don’t forget to bring presents for me tonight. Merry Christmas!”
• “So flippin’ excited to spend this Christmas with you. Can’t wait to make some funny moments with you.”
• “Lob a snowball at me, and I’ll declare war. Let’s make this one the best Christmas for us together! Merry Christmas to you!”
• “I would say all I want for Christmas is YOU, But I really would love a new credit card as well!”

• “I Wish Santa fill your socks with candy and your wallet with money. Have a nice and warm holiday season my love! Merry Christmas to you!”
• “Santa has already given me what I have wished for so long. Now I want him to fill your socks too! Merry Christmas!”
• “With you, the craziest winter breeze seems warmer than a hot coffee. Thanks for making my Christmas wonderful and my life by simply being you.”

Funny Christmas Wishes For Your Boyfriend Or Husband

• Here are some great funny Christmas wishes for your boyfriend or husband.
• “Christmas is the time to be with good people. So make a plan to spend the whole Christmas with me. Merry Christmas, love!”
• “Having you by my side this Christmas means everything extra. Extra food, extra admiration, extra bills- everything. Love you anyway, Merry Christmas”
• “Your name has been missing from both the naughty and nice list of Santa. So, I told him to search for your name on his handsome list. I’m sure he will find it there!”
• “Merry Christmas, the love of my life. After all our fancy Christmas dinners, I enjoy the fact that I am not the only one washing the dishes.”

• “Take my Christmas love and remember to bring me gifts. Merry Christmas!”
• “I’d like to say that all I want for Christmas is you, but I’d also like a new credit card! Merry Christmas, sweetheart!”
• “Sending your way a bundle of warm wishes and good luck on this holiday. Take my love and don’t forget to bring presents for me tonight. Merry Christmas!”
• “All I want for Christmas is YOU but as I have already got you, thanks in advance for the hot chocolate on Christmas eve. Merry Christmas.”
• “Santa said you’ve been a great one this year. So, he will be giving you free vouchers to clean the house and find random things.”
• “Lob a snowball at me, and I’ll declare war. Let’s make this one the best Christmas for us together! Merry Christmas to you!”
• “Nowadays, you look like Santa with a big tummy and a long beard. Guess what, you are going to the gym next year! Happy Holidays!”
• “May all your savings don’t get spent on Christmas presents but do find me something special. Merry Christmas.”

Funny Christmas Wishes for Her

1. “Christmas is a festival of love and good spirit, so make sure you shower me with lots of love this holiday. Merry Christmas.”
2. “Wishing for a fat bearded guy to visit me at night is not cool. I’d rather wish it was you in a red gown. Merry Christmas!”
3. “I have no money to spend for you this Christmas but know that I always have time to spend with you this Christmas! I love you!”
4. “You’re too young to go to clubs with friends. Pray for gifts from Santa or let’s go on a date this Christmas. Merry Christmas Cutypie!”
5. “Enjoy your holiday and feel the magic of Christmas this year. Witness how money disappears and how I lose my sanity. Merry Christmas!”
6. “Santa asked me what my heart wanted this Christmas! I told him your name, and he said you’re already in my heart! Merry Christmas!”
7. “Everything grows old, except for You and Santa. Merry Christmas, my love. Sending warm wishes on your way this Christmas!”
8. “If I forget to bring presents for you, keep your doors open. Santa will definitely come with a box of chocolates. Merry Christmas!”

Funny Christmas Wishes For Girlfriend Or Wife

• “Or maybe you are looking for funny Christmas wishes for your girlfriend or wife.”
• “So flippin’ excited to spend this Christmas with you. Can’t wait to make some funny moments with you.”
• “Santa asked me what my heart wants this Christmas! I told him your name, and he said you’re already in my heart! Merry Christmas!”
• “When I say I don’t want any present, I am fibbing … so I will be waiting for my surprise Christmas gift… Merry Christmas my love!!!”
• “I don’t need any more presents on Christmas because I have you and I am sure you can buy me everything that I want … Merry Christmas and thanks for making it so special.”
• “I don’t think I need any gifts this Christmas because I have the biggest present and that is you my love. Warm wishes to the loveliest and cutest man I know… Merry Christmas.”
• “Santa’s did not find your name in the bad people’s list. So I told him to look in the cute list. And now he is on his way. Merry Christmas.”
• “Everything grows old, except for You and Santa. Merry Christmas, my love. Sending warm wishes on your way this Christmas!”
• “I hope when Santa comes at midnight, he brings you wrapped in a box as my Christmas gift! That would make a perfect Christmas for me this year!”

Funny Christmas Wishes for Friends

• “Stop asking for presents from Santa and be the Santa for the kids around you. Suits your age. Merry Christmas!”
• “I just wanted to let you know that you will be on Santa’s naughty list this year. Merry Christmas!”
• “Santa told me you are on the good list this year; I told him it was just a lack of opportunity. Just kidding! Have a wonderful Christmas!”
• “May your Christmas be filled with large smiles and festivities, but not with a big belly. Merry Christmas!”
• “Wishing you a white Christmas this year. If you run out of the white one, remember I have plenty of supply for the red one. Merry Christmas dear friend!”
• “You’re now at a stage of your life when you really need to ask yourself if you believe in Santa or not! Grow up, man. Merry Christmas!”
• “Congratulations on making it to the top five of Santa’s naughty list once again. You are truly a gem of a friend!”
• “I’ve just received the bad news. Santa had a heart attack. Cause of death was your name on the good list of this year!”
• “I’ve just received the bad news. Santa had a heart attack. Cause of death was your name on the good list of this year!”
• “May you make it through the priest’s dull speech and join us at the party soon. Have an incredible Christmas!”
• “Christmas is the only time when eating candy out of socks is cool! Good luck with your smelly socks and expired candies. Merry Christmas!”
• “I’ll declare war if you throw a snowball at me. Let’s make this the happiest Christmas we’ve ever had! Merry Christmas!”